Long ago, I was quite sure of myself - of where I was going. But all my assumptions of my future fell flat on my face. Apparently, it ain’t God’s plan.

I got involved in church and met some new friends that changed my whole LIFE.

I never wanted to leave anymore! All my thoughts about the world vanished. I was no longer superficial. I didn’t care about whether I have this or that or if I knew this or that or whatever. All I cared about was church, church, church. I became a completely different person.

And the moment I loved it… I was pulled away.

Like Paul, I was sent on a ship… to Cebu.

I never dreamed of coming here. I wasn’t excited to go! They said it was for my future. I didn’t care! I had this COMPLETE trust in God that no matter what I will still have a bright future even if I don’t study in a prestigious school.

Why does He want me to make it in Cebu. It would’ve been fine in IPIL.

Anyway, my coming here is all His plan. I wouldn’t disobey. I’ll just follow his orders and accept whatever He has in store for me here.

I’m not worried, too. Coz I know I’m in God’s hands.

Dear Blog,

        Do I have to say that? Anyway, it’s confirmed. I’m… We are moving to Canada. I’m going to study in Canada, I’m going to live in Canada, make friends in Canada, all things Canada! It sucks! And this bothers me. Why am I not excited?

        Usually, when it comes to these things, I immediately swirl in joy! I mean, this is what I’ve been wishing for all my 17 years of life! To get the hell out of this country and move to America! And it’s finally gonna happen! Not exactly in the United States but that’s close enough! I could merely cross over to the other side. It’s funny, ‘coz one day I’m dreaming about it, doing everything I could at the moment to make it come true, and then the next thing I know is that my mom telling me to get myself ready to move! But I’m not happy, at the moment! What in blazes is going on?!

        The only good things are: I get to make new friends – friends that will finally get me because I talk and act like them, study in McGill University with any course ‘coz over there anything happens, live in a new place, start a clean slate, live like those kids in the movies, and watch Evanescence live this fall!!!

        But…aAaArgGghhH!!!

     I thought I was gonna leave. I thought I’m finally gonna be able to live on my own and experience what’s it like to be an independent, self-reliant student. But guess what? All those thoughts are still thoughts. And that sucks.

     My mom is planning to move in Canada and she wants me to study there. She wants me to postpone my college here in the Philippines so that I could start as a freshman in Canada. In October! And it’s June! So what am I supposed to do in July, August, and September? Oh, not to worry, my mom has it all figured out!!!

     She seems to have every single thing figured out, taking risks that sound absurd. And where does it place me? Caught in the middle of it all! Way to go, mom.

       I’m going to study a semester in one of the stupid, pathetic colleges we have here in this lame excuse for a town (The town itself is ok, it’s the people and the things they do that’s lame).

       Now, that’s a bold step. For a guy like me! But, whatever. Anything goes today! I’m not happy about it too. That means all the crap that I’m trying to escape or forget or whatever is still right in my face, ready to bite me in the ass.

       NO!!! I won’t let it get to me. I’m going to put on an attitude. I’m not going to be like the ol’ days. It’s different this time. I’m going to change my behavior and whatnot into a whole new different one. One that projects a message that says, ‘’What yOu loOkin’ aT?!”

       No, no, not a dark, angry, emo type. Umm… it’s kinda hard to verbalize. Just think Paramore. I’m not sure. Maybe you’ll think differently. But if you do get what I mean then congratulations! (Imaginary hat)

       So, yeah, I’m done yacking. LOL. Oh and one last thing, Justin Beiber is overrated and your idea of love sickens me.

For many, many centuries, we humans have looked up and stared at the wonder above us. We stare in amazement and curiosity. We come up with stories and facts that never fail to amaze us even more! We are astounded all because we stare at the twinkling lights. But the question is… do they stare back?

For as long as humans have discovered what it is up there, they have also asked the question, “Is anyone alive out there? Is anything?” The universe is vastly wide that it’s hard to believe that nothing alive is out there. Aliens, as what we call them. And if there are, are they really hostile, or are they friendly, or are they ignorant, or are they even just simple plant-like creatures, or an advanced version of Earth’s green feathers? Or are they just simple bacterium that breathes an unknown element which has no plans of world invasion whatsoever? The possibilities are endless! Or are they? It may not even be possible! But who knows? Maybe one of these extraterrestrial dudes is living among us - maybe even responsible for the invention of highly sophisticated devices! Or maybe they are just like us - stuck in their own world wondering the same thing! So many guesses, so many questions, it’s just simply spellbinding.

And their world! What’s it like? Is it like Pandora? The planet depicted in the movie Avatar? Or the many suggested terrains shown in the movie Treasure Planet? Plants which light up, animals that have weird anatomies, a sea of electricity – literally! There’s more! A fragment planet which only has one thing above it – a huge flower the size of the sun! Come on, you think! Really, think! I’ll wait. ‘Coz I got nothin’ else to say…

My life as of now is falling apart. Well, not really, but my plans for a bright future are. All my life I had been excited for college and beyond, planning and daydreaming the future that I had in mind. It’s all rosy, beautiful, amazing. Then life throws you a curve.

A damn curve. My plans are all over the place! Shards of hopes and aspirations. All broken. Wasted years, wasted game. It’s sad! So… do I whine about it?

My mom has this attitude that if something is not right or is wrong or she’s simply in a rough time, she will yak about it on and on and on and on!!! Then she gets mad at everybody! Then she starts to blame us (especially me) why she’s having crap all the time. Eugh! I never wanted to be like that.

I NEVER WHINE.

That’s just it! I don’t complain. It’s not that I don’t wanna - I just don’t! If something ever goes wrong with me, I don’t usually complain about it. I just sit back, grab a can of soda and think about it. It’s one of the many things I’m proud of myself. I easily go through under pressure because I don’t complain. I just do what I have to do. That’s all. No fuss.

So, what about this time? I though I had everything in the bag. But the bag ripped open and out came the contents into the dirty ground. I don’t know where to go from here!!! Right now, at this exact moment, I am nowhere! NO-WHERE.

How in heaven do I go from NO-WHERE to NOW-HERE?

on my planet? i’d say planet adventure. coz it’s fun and FUN!!!

solar? mars probably.

he he

Yesterday, I got bitten by a tiny dog on the thumb and man, it hurts! Not that much, but still. It bled therefore it hurt.

Now, I’m worried about rabies. IF I am going to die that would suck. Damn, it will. So like, how is death like? They say death due to rabies is excruciatingly painful. Oh, gosh. I once imagined death to be cold and numbing.

So… goodbye cruel world.

But seriously, come on! Really?!

Probably NOT! Are you crazy?!

     I was in Zamboanga a few days ago and I had another one of those very annoying pitfalls in the fast food business.

     THEY FORGOT TO ADD MAYONNAISE ON MY BURGER!!!

     Jollibee! Just a few weeks I bought a coke float and they forgot the ice making the float suck! And just last month I bought 2 burgers and they forgot to include a ketchup packet. What’s up with that? Can’t they sharpen their brains enough to be alive, alert, awake and enthusiastic?! Tell them!

     Another story: I bought take-out and they actually forgot to put it in a plastic bag. I HAD TO TELL THEM!

P.S

This article isn’t written by me. It’s by a wonderful friend of mine who submitted this to me to be published as a feature article…supposedly. Well, the newspaper wasn’t published because of some “financial” crap.

Her Withstanding Legacy

By Julie Jane Testa

     She was just a plain wife of a charismatic senator who fought dictatorship against the powerful force of the Marcos regime. Her husband’s death fired up the Filipino’s nationalism in the 1986 EDSA revolution. She symbolizes the restoration of the country’s democracy after the country’s plight with the abused power of Martial Law.

     Cory continued the fight for the total freedom of the Filipinos despite of the series of problems that she encountered during her administration. During her presidency, seven coup attempts tried to block the country’s recovery from the previous rule. The country was also visited by serious natural calamities and overwhelmed  by man made ones.

      uhmm…i got tired. hehe . i’ll continue next week

I realized one giant thing lately. That no matter how hard you try to plan your day it’s never going to go as you expected! Yeah, the plan may happen, but still life is unpredictable.

Recently, I went to Western Mindanao State University to apply for college. I had a game plan. It was good. But! The way it happened didn’t go with what I had in mind. So what did I do? I IMPROVISED!

It’s awesome! I slapped me in the face. No more will I ponder over my agenda that hard. ‘Coz I got a weapon: Improvisation.